I was just emailing a client when I thought… you know I should really share this with everyone.
Healing and empowerment can come to us in interesting “lessons”.
This situation we were talking about is something that most of us do or have done at some point in our life….. get pissed at ourself and then get frustrated and berate ourself for not being perfect.
Right? or am I the only one who does that?
I learned in the last few years from a multitude of books that I have read from many many authors (Wayne Dyer, Beth Moore, Louise Hay, Joyce Meyer to name a few) that you have to figure out a way to be your own BFF. There is healing in learning how to be your own best friend. Now, of course, being your own BFF is not exactly what the gurus said, but that is my interpretation of many of teachings that lead to empowerment.
In the email my client was upset at herself for finding herself triggered by that she has been working on, something that she was doing the spiritual healing work on, but it came up again even though she feels like she has dealt with it already……
What I told her was “Instead of being pissed at yourself… you really need to love yourself. You’re feelings are your biggest indicator as to something being wrong, so a better way to handle this would be to love yourself… maybe pretend you are your best friend and in that situation actually stop what you’re doing, and be a good friend to yourself. Ask yourself “what is wrong, and how can I help? ” Isn’t that what a good friend would do?
Beating yourself up is not the way to release anxiety…..again this is just a pattern we learn.”
This pattern of of self abuse is really prevalent in a lot of people I know. I don’t know when or how it became so acceptable to treat ourselves so poorly. Most of us would never treat our friend the way that we treat ourselves. We would have a much higher expectation of how we would treat someone else! It is time to heal this pattern.
I just want you to try this the next time you are mad at yourself for something that you “did wrong.”
Instead of being pissed at yourself, pretend you are your best friend and ask yourself “what is wrong, and how can I help?”
Honor yourself in that moment and know that you are human and you’re not perfect and that it is perfectly ok to not be perfect!